What am I missing?!

I don't usually buy glossy magazines; I've bought maybe four in the last two years. And this is why...

What you have to get through in Elle Magazine (UK) March edition, before you actually get to read anything:-

1. A girl sprawled not once but three times in woodland for Louis Vuitton;
2. Estee Lauder telling me that their scientists think my skin is ageing too fast and I need Advanced Night Repair;
3. Madonna putting on lipstick in front of a little girl for Dolce & Gabbana;
4. a big white bag with a rock on it for Prada;
5. a model doing an impressive backwards crab pose for Gucci;
6. two girls or the same once twice (can't tell) for Emporio Armani;
7. Marlene Dietrich lookalike for Dior;
8. a man and a woman dressed as matadores for Chanel;
9. a girl in a woollen suit for Chanel (again);
10. a diamond advert.

Then the contents page! Then immediately afterwards:

1. advert for Clinique mascara;
2. Chanel jewellery;
3. Marilyn Manson inspired woman for Miu Miu;
4. Hermoine Granger clutching Burberry;
5. Charlize Theron emerging from a gold pond for Dior;
6. an advert for the very magazine I'm reading;
7. Keira Knightley pouting (oddly enough), this time for Chanel Coco Mademoiselle;
8. Jordan lookalike sprawled on a dirty floor for 'Guess';
9. 6 naked models for D&G;
10. awkward looking girls jumping strangely and dressed in purple for Alberta Ferretti;
11. moody girl in pink for Hugo Boss;
12. legs, white shirt and red nail varnish for YvesSaintLaurent

Then the legal/administrative information for the magazine, an advert for the Elle website and ANOTHER advert; this time for Mulberry.

Tell me if I'm missing something but I think it gets so boring I forget that I'm holding something I paid for, and mistake it something someone handed me in the street. I understand magazines need to sell advertising space, but really... if you're a company you're being shafted; more seasoned magazine buyers than me flick to the end.